Futures and Truths

Bluebonnets danced around her white skirt as she turned her face toward the sun. She only needed a few for the vase. Perhaps a little joy would soothe the inevitable unease at the table that night. It was always tense when meeting with the elders. She hoped enough time had passed. They had to know that there was nothing she could do or would do, even if she could, to change what happened, right?

She brushed a stray hair from her forehead and tucked it behind her ear as she bent down to collect a handful of the small blue flowers. She took a deep breath before heading back toward the commune. Tonight was the night she would finally get her say. Everyone had refused to even look at her, let alone talk to her ever since it happened.

That was six months ago, however. She was tired of being the outcast, tired of being shunned by her own people. She had known even then that her decision would cause controversy. But, she knew it was the right thing to do, and she stood by that. Many felt she should have left, that she should have moved on after doing what she’d done. There were others who would have done just that. But, this was her home. It was the only home she had ever known.

Now, she just had to make sure they listened to her, that they heard her side of the story. She had to get them to understand that the decision she had made was the right thing to do. She’d known that if she could get the elders to agree to sit down with her, the others would follow. She chose to take it as a good sign that they had agreed to meet with her at all.

She placed the bluebonnets in the vase and felt a small smile spread across her face. The happy little flowers really did brighten the room. She smoothed her skirt and wrung her hands as she looked around her single room hut. They would be here soon. She could hear her blood rushing through her body, and her hands were beginning to shake.

She closed her eyes and thought back to that day six months ago, sitting alone in a cold dimly lit room. She could still feel the cool metal of the table underneath her hands. The same metallic taste that had been in her mouth then crept back now. She swallowed hard.

She sat there in that room by herself, her hands flat on the table, the coolness of the metal sending a cold feeling through her entire body. She closed her eyes and took deep breaths, trying to slow her racing heart. She knew she was doing the right thing, she just needed to convince her nerves of that. She couldn’t chicken out, she had to stay strong. They needed to know what he had done. It had all gone on for far too long. She had to do it. She had to do it for the others at the commune. She had to do it for herself. More importantly, she had to do it for the life that was growing inside her.

She jumped when the door opened, and a large man filled the doorway, blocking the light from the hallway before entering the room. He put a steaming cup of tea down in front of her, she wrapped her cold hands around it. He sat down opposite her and took a battered notebook out of his coat pocket, placing it on the table. The click of his pen made her jump again. She took a sip of the hot liquid, telling herself to calm down and focus.

She took another sip, and finally looked up into his eyes. They were hard, yet comforting. He encouraged her to start at the beginning and tell him everything. With a sigh she did just that. She started at the day she had arrived at the commune and took him all the way through to the day that had led her to that moment.

A knock at the door brought her back to the present. She placed a comforting hand on her growing belly and took one more deep breath. She knew exactly what needed to be said, and she was ready now.

The little blue flowers waved their encouragement as she breezed by them, opening the door to her future.